Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Sleepless Nights

I wish i could learn how to turn my mind off and not think about ANYTHING for once. It seems like no matter what i'm doing, all day long, i have at least 5 things on my mind. If i have something i need to do... i can't relax until it's done. So needless to say when i do try to sleep... my mind is flooded with about 50 things.
Last night i tried going to bed at 10:30. I laid awake for about an hour thinking about all the things i had to do today. And then what had to be done the following day. By midnight i was beyond frustrated. Not even close to falling asleep yet, my mind wandered to a few things that had really been bothering me lately. Since i was already frustrated by not being able to sleep, thinking about this other stuff really got me irritated. It was about 1:30am by the time i drifted off, exhausted from my thoughts. SO i'm taking this time to write about what's been bothering me in hopes of getting to sleep at a decent time tonight :)

First of all...
Good friends are hard to find. I mean real friends. People that accept you for who you are. People you can trust. People who generally want the best for you... and visa versa. I've been fortunate enough to have a few friends like this over the years. However... life seems to have made us drift apart. And now i look around at all the people i know and think... are they really my friends? I mean they are my friends... but i'm missing that closeness best friends have. There's not much more to say about this except i wish i was closer with my "friends" that feel more like acquaintances. If you want to hang out... you have to call them. And then half the time they cancel. They want to look in your life through facebook... but that's about it. They see you on the street and say "we should hang out!" but we never do. Who knows... maybe this is just the way of the world today. I mean half my family is like this too. But still... i miss the closeness i had with my friends growing up.

Im really shocked at how people react when they find out neither me or my husband drink alcohol. Is it really that big of a deal??? It's always the same reaction... "Really? You don't drink? Like at all? Ever? WHY NOT!?"
We don't drink because we don't like it. We don't like how it makes us feel. We don't like feeling tipsy... and we don't like throwing up after having one too many. On occasion... maybe like once a year, we will have a drink. But we really don't like how alcohol tastes. The only thing Matt will drink is MGD. And the only think i will usually drink is Alize Red. This is something that we were pretty happy to have in common when we met.

Just because we don't drink doesn't mean we have a problem with people that do! All our friends drink and most of our family does too. It doesn't bother us to be around drunk people, in fact it's just as entertaining for someone who's sober to be at a party as it is for people who have been drinking. So just because we don't drink doesn't mean we don't want to hang out with you if you are partying!

Anyway there are other things that are bugging me but i'm going to leave those for another time. In fact... i'm following the radio's footsteps and taking Ticked Off Tuesdays to my blog. And if anyone else has something to rant about... please, feel free! Sometimes it just feels better to get it out.. and i hear, it can help you sleep better too :)


  1. Melatonin is great for insomnia. And ranting. Good post. I like you, even if you don't drink ;)

  2. 1. I agree with the friends bit...I find myself more and more the older I get not wanting to meet new people...I think I just don't like people...but the friends I do have are the ones that have been there for me through thick and thin..

    2. I have recently given up alcohol for good. So good on you and Matt!